After two equally poor posters for the Pang brothers remake of their own film, Bangkok Dangerous, we now have two equally poor trailers for the latest vehicle for Nicolas Cage’s hair. They’re not all that different, one’s about 30 seconds longer, so we can only assume that one’s a US version and the other is an international one. At least now we’ve some idea what’s going on, after the Spanish-language version that was around a couple of months ago.
1:28 mins –
2:07 mins –
From the first, shorter of the two, we learn Joe’s (Nicolas Cage) “four rules”:
1) don’t ask questions
2) there is no right and wrong
3) don’t take an interest in people outside of work
4) know when to get out, and walk away rich
No prizes for guessing the four things that Joe ends up not doing before the film is through, eh?
The second trailer has a different opening narration that can only be described as a bad personal ad spiel:
My job takes me to a lot of places. I sleep alone. I eat alone. I’d like to meet someone, but it’s tough when you live out of a suitcase. My name is Joe. This is what I do.
Aw. I guess that’s just what happens when you choose to drive your career through the shit, Mr. Cage.
The whole thing seems a tad messy, with jumpy editing and lots and lots of guns. It will no doubt find an audience, but the interesting premise of the original (that of a deaf-mute hitman) has been dropped for this re-make. There is only a fleeting glimpse of the local girl he falls for, who’s now the deaf-mute (played by Charlie Yeung). Cage delivers his lines of dialogue with his typical monotone drawl, while finding a conscious and fighting the “bad” guys. And the whole “follow the path of the bullet” thing has already been done (better) in the opening credits for Lord of War, the last time Cage was in a semi-decent film.
But above all…the hair! Oh, the hair. One doesn’t like to labour a point, but oh….my….god!! We can only presume that the poor deaf-mute girl is probably wishing they’d made her blind instead.