Emile Hirsch at the Speed Racer Premiere

So, you’re Emile Hirsch, right? Imagine that. Picture that. You’re attending the WORLD PREMIERE of your newest film, which just happens to be Speed Racer, which just happens to cost somewhere in the region of $120 million, about 120 times the cost of anything else you’ve been in. But you’re all about being the next Sean Penn, what with being in his films and being super serious in just about everything else you’ve been in. Even in The Girl Next Door, we don’t think we can remember you smiling, just acting with your eyelids and being very upset that your hot neighbour who likes you used to be a porn star. Woe.

Anyways, you’re trying to show off that you can be a serious actor, but that you can also pretty much single handedly carry the weight of a popcorn-y blockbuster. So how do you show up to your premiere? Well…… If you were Emile Hirsch, you probably wouldn’t have taken this particular route:

Did this premiere double up as a rodeo/hootananny? Why is your denim jacket buttoned like that? Oh, and Jodie Foster called. She wants her hair-do back. That is all.

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