Review for “Sex And The City” OST

While we all know that a good/bad soundtrack does not a good/bad movie make, there doesn’t seem to be another movie this year (aside from Step Up 2) that will sell as many soundtracks as Sex And The City, and its also fair to say that some of the best soundtracks of recent years have accompanied some of the best movies of recent years (Pulp Fiction, Almost Famous, uhm, Step Up 2). So, with that in mind, here’s a review of the Sex And The City OST:

One; Fergie “Labels Or Love”

There probably isn’t a better named song to suit this particular movie, and the use of a slightly remixed version of the theme to the show is “inventive”, but none of this takes away from the fact that this is still the worst song you’ve ever heard Fergie sing. Which is really saying something.

Two; Jennifer Hudson “All Dressed In Love”.

The obligitory “song from the singer in the movie” sounds like a leftover from Dreamgirls. Despite Hudson’s amazing voice and writing duties from Cee-Lo Green aka one half of Gnarls Barkley, this still sounds like one of the crappy jazz songs that blonde chick used to sing at the end of Ally McBeal.

Three; Duffy “Mercy”

Yes, this song is amazing, and yes, its placement here should help her crack the states, but seriously, if we hear this song one more time, we’re gonna find that Welsh bitch and bring an abrupt end to her.

Four; Nina Simone “The Look Of Love” (Madison Park/Lenny B Remix)

A classic song given the end-of-the-night-in-a-gay-disco remix. Saved from absolute awfulness thanks only to Simone’s smokey delivery.

Five; Morningwood “New York Girls”

Do you get it? New York Girls, and this film is set in New York, and its about…. well, women, but still, close enough, eh? There’s nothing necessarily wrong with this song, except for the Korn-alike guitar assualt near the chorus. And the fact you won’t be able to remember what it sounds like 5 seconds after you’ve heard it.

Six; The Weepies “All This Beauty”

For a band monickered so blatantly depressing, this song is very upbeat and Beach Boys-esque. Its actually kinda nice. You can almost see the costume change montage that this goes to, the girls try something on for fun, then for serious, and then one of them trips out of their changing room in just their undies, and they all laugh and laugh and laugh. But then you’ll never hear this song again. Ever.

Seven; Kaskade “I Like The Way”

Cutting edge spelling aside, we’re back in the gay disco, assuming its trance night and everyone is off their heads on poppers. This doesn’t belong on this soundtrack. It should be on Hawt Ibiza Jamz Summer ’05. If thats your bag, then you’ll love this song. But you’re also in need of some kind of intervention.

Eight; Jem “It’s Amazing”

Lets get this out of the way. We love Jem. Ever since her first song 3 years ago, and her subsequent disappearance from the face of the planet, we love her. And this song doesn’t change that. Its the best song of the whole thing that you haven’t already heard of (Damn you, Duffy!).

Nine; The Bird & The Bee “How Deep Is Your Love”

Yes, its a cover of that song. And its kinda nice. But, as with most of the vaguely okay songs on here, you won’t ever ever ever ever ever need or want to listen to it ever again. Just put on the Bee Gee’s instead. It’ll save you having to answer the question “Who’s singing this?”, and then you’ll have to say “The Bird And The Bee” and then they give you that look….. You know the look we’re talking about….

Ten; India.Arie “The Heart Of The Matter”

Honestly, when I put this song on first, I thought it had skipped back to number 2. But then after a few seconds, I realised it was the song from the ad that plays over the end. And again, there’s nothing wrong with this song. But it won’t bother the charts, your stereo or your memory any time in near future.

Eleven; Mairi Campbell & Dave Francis “Auld Lang Syne”

This is pointless, inexcusable and should have been on the P.S. I Love You OST. If you ever find yourself in the unfortunate situation to hear this, then you’ll understand why.

Twelve; Bliss “Kissing”

Kinda sounds like The Corrs mixed with Enya mixed with Annie Lennox during her “creative” years, and everything bad that that combination implies. Multiplied by the fact that its over 6 minutes long. Rumour has it that playing this song is one of the torture devices in Saw 5. Vicious.

Thirteen; Al Green feat Joss Stone “How Can You Mend A Broken Heart”

The world has probably had its feel of Joss Stone by this point, but Al Green is an absolute legend, and even though she’s a biohazard of a woman, Stone still has a classic voice, and when they duet on this amazing song, it really does work wonders. But again, this will appeal to absolutely no-one, since most young women won’t know or appreciate who Al Green is, and most people hate Joss Stone. And here we are.

Fourteen; Run DMC -vs- Aerosmith “Walk This Way”

If you can’t think why you can no longer listen to this fantastic song, I’ve got four words for you. Sugababes -vs- Girls Aloud. Which, surely, would’ve been a much better choice for this album, non?

Fifteen; Pfeifer Broz Orchestra “Sex And The City Movie Theme”

Nobody listens to this. It’s a slightly louder, more percussionistic version of the television theme, and nobody is going to listen to this, because why would they? Like most of this album, they’ve already heard it and are sick to death of it.

So, in conclusion, and at a push, 6 good songs out of 15. And yet still, it’ll sell more than any of actually good and talented artists of the playlist would on their own. Somebody get me the Step Up 2 OST, I need me some Timbaland…..

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3 responses to “Review for “Sex And The City” OST

  1. I too am one of those people who wonder how Jem disappeared off the face of the planet. She has such a great voice.

  2. Poor, poor RUN DMC. 😦

  3. I’m going to have to track down this “Jem” you speak of. As for music I’m currently aware of, The Bird and The Bee are fantastic, Al Green is a legend, and I do not want to know how they fit “Walk This Way” into the SATC movie. Yikes!

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